I sit up in bed and throw off the comforter. The clock is wrong, the room is wrong. I don't own a comforter...not like this one.
Wait... wait for the adjustment... eyes focusing. There. Wait... they shouldn't be focusing. They shouldn't. I wear glasses, legally blind. I shouldn't be able to see without them. But I can. Dear Lord, I can. And what do I see?
The night sky. No ceiling... or is it a glass ceiling? I reach up... It's too far to touch but maybe I will catch a reflection.
What's that? It looks like a star, a pinprick of light in the horribly dark canvas above me. It's not the only star, but it's the only one that's growing closer.
Closer? Jump up! Run to the door. Locked! Race to the windows. Locked. I look for something to smash something in my way. No! Nothing!
It was the size of the head of pin, a period on a page. Now it's like a burning baseball heading towards the ground. Towards me.
Up! I gotta go up! I run to the walls! They're too sheer. I can't get a foot hold. I scream but the fireball keeps coming! Keeps growing! I want to curse! I want to cry! But I don't. Neither will help.
The baseball has changed sports. It's now a fiery basketball. Is it speeding up?
The bookshelf!!! The bookshelf!!! I run to the shelf and throw all the books on the floor. Dictionaries! Encyclopedias! Bibles! (Why do I have so many bibles?) Stack them! Brace them against the book shelf. Move faster!
The basketball-turned-beach ball-turned full moon is starting to fill my view. Obscuring the sky. I'm ready. I run toward the book shelf ladder and scramble up the wall. I hit the glass ceiling hard and fall back to the floor.
Deep breath! Grunt! Grunt! Run! I feel a shelf give way. But I have enough force to slam into that clear obstruction again. It strains, stretches and then shatters. Pieces of glass tumble lazily to the ground even as I rocket over the wall and land painfully in the moist grass.
The fireball hangs in the sky like the morning sun. Even if I ran...
But I can't think like that. I just have to run. I have to try!
To my surprise, my legs work like they never had before. They thrust me forward like a rocket and I watch my abandoned house fade into the distance. Then it was replaced by a large explosion. I can see the glow chasing me, pacing my steps. But it's too late. I'm out of its reach.
I sat in the grass and watched the flames attack the sky as it consumes wood, glass, books and history. Tears roll down my cheeks! So much history... so much gone...
Rising, I begin to walk towards what I can not see. I am dazed. I don't understand... not even after I wake up.
What do you think this means?
Thursday, April 27, 2006
Friday, April 21, 2006
Evaluations... A Funny...
These individual quotes were reportedly taken from actual employee performance evaluations throughout the U.S. (I don't believe it either.) Hopefully, none of us will be seeing similar ones on ours.
- Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
- His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.
- I would not allow this employee to breed.
- This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't be.
- Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
- When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet.
- He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
- This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
- He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
- This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
- This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better.
- He's got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
- A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.
- Gates are down, lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
- Has two brains: one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
- If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
- If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.
- If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the oceans.
- One neuron short of a Synapse.
- Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled.
- Takes him 1.5 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
- The wheel is still turning, but the hamster is dead.
- Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
- His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.
- I would not allow this employee to breed.
- This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't be.
- Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
- When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet.
- He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
- This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
- He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
- This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
- This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better.
- He's got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.
- A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.
- Gates are down, lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
- Has two brains: one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
- If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
- If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change.
- If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the oceans.
- One neuron short of a Synapse.
- Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled.
- Takes him 1.5 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
- The wheel is still turning, but the hamster is dead.
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
Cheer Up Church by Charlie Peacock
His was a voice, fueled by truth
That spoke to us of God's grace
In a way that we could understand
And take hold of
His was a life defined by grace
For a time and for a reason
And so we bow and give thanks to God
For the life of our brother
It's just like God to make a hero from a sinner
It's just like God to choose the loser not the winner
It's just like God to tell a story through a weak
To let the gospel speak through the life of a man
who'd be the first to say...
"Cheer up church
You're worse off than you think
Cheer up church
You're standing at the brink
Don't despair, do not fear, grace is near"
written by Charile Peaock
© 1999 Sparrow Song/Andi Beat Goes On Music/BMI
Thursday, April 13, 2006
Lines
Soooooooo.... Sunday, I went down for a prayer line...
Maybe you don't know how I feel about prayer lines and healing lines and dotted lines and even double yellow lines... all about the same. They make me nervous. Sometimes I think I'm an outside the lines person trying to live a "color within the lines" life.
It's not that I can't color in the lines, it's just that the picture I see isn't always what everyone else tells me I'm supposed to see. Kind of like one of those inkblot tests. "What do you mean that's a spider? It looks like an alien spaceship to me!"
Call it the rebel in me. Call it several years of charasmania. Call it even more years of strict religious traditionalism. (Snap your fingers, wear red, make a mistake, go to hell. Go directly to Hell. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200 dollars.)Call it Bob. I don't care. But me and lines have not gotten along for years.
I'm in graphic arts. I know what lines are for. They are used for definition. If I want you to see what I see, I have to put lines on the paper and define it. If I want you to see a stop sign, I have to make lines that spell out the word "Stop" in whatever way you'll understand. Lines define. Lines limit. I don't always like it. But I know they are necessary.
That's why we draw lines in the sand; why we tow the line; why we stand in line; line things up; read line by line; and so on. Lines can be good. But lines can be bad too. Color lines, racial lines, denominational lines, party lines, and those awfully long lines at Six Flags during the summer.... but I digress.
But I needed a line on Sunday. I needed to define what I believed. I needed definition to the nebulous "sure God can do anything" type of faith I had been living. It was a blank sheet of paper. So I went down to put lines around my faith. To get a good picture of what I wanted from God. I wanted to be healed. I wanted the pain that I have been living with daily to go away. Lots of people were in line. We were defining our request to God. IF our bodies still ached when we went back to our seats, that was ok. We love God for who HE is not just what he does. But for this moment of faith, it was time to get out of our seats and stand in line. Maybe even draw a line in the sand within ourselves. "You have not because you ask not..." "(Keep)asking and you will receive. (Keep)seeking and you will find. (Keep)knocking and the door will be opened to you."
And as I walked away with no pain in my legs or arms. I realized... sometimes lines can be good.
Maybe you don't know how I feel about prayer lines and healing lines and dotted lines and even double yellow lines... all about the same. They make me nervous. Sometimes I think I'm an outside the lines person trying to live a "color within the lines" life. It's not that I can't color in the lines, it's just that the picture I see isn't always what everyone else tells me I'm supposed to see. Kind of like one of those inkblot tests. "What do you mean that's a spider? It looks like an alien spaceship to me!"
Call it the rebel in me. Call it several years of charasmania. Call it even more years of strict religious traditionalism. (Snap your fingers, wear red, make a mistake, go to hell. Go directly to Hell. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200 dollars.)Call it Bob. I don't care. But me and lines have not gotten along for years.
I'm in graphic arts. I know what lines are for. They are used for definition. If I want you to see what I see, I have to put lines on the paper and define it. If I want you to see a stop sign, I have to make lines that spell out the word "Stop" in whatever way you'll understand. Lines define. Lines limit. I don't always like it. But I know they are necessary. 
That's why we draw lines in the sand; why we tow the line; why we stand in line; line things up; read line by line; and so on. Lines can be good. But lines can be bad too. Color lines, racial lines, denominational lines, party lines, and those awfully long lines at Six Flags during the summer.... but I digress.
But I needed a line on Sunday. I needed to define what I believed. I needed definition to the nebulous "sure God can do anything" type of faith I had been living. It was a blank sheet of paper. So I went down to put lines around my faith. To get a good picture of what I wanted from God. I wanted to be healed. I wanted the pain that I have been living with daily to go away. Lots of people were in line. We were defining our request to God. IF our bodies still ached when we went back to our seats, that was ok. We love God for who HE is not just what he does. But for this moment of faith, it was time to get out of our seats and stand in line. Maybe even draw a line in the sand within ourselves. "You have not because you ask not..." "(Keep)asking and you will receive. (Keep)seeking and you will find. (Keep)knocking and the door will be opened to you."And as I walked away with no pain in my legs or arms. I realized... sometimes lines can be good.
Monday, April 10, 2006
Meet Margaret - In her own words...
Planned parenthood? If the title of the organization doesn't say it all, maybe we'll let the founder, Maggie Sanger, speak for herself.... But first, a word from her sponsor.
"As we celebrate the 100th birthday of Margaret Sanger, our outrageous and our courageous leader, we will probably find a number of areas in which we may find more about Margaret Sanger than we thought we wanted to know..."
Faye Wattleton, Past-president of Planned Parenthood
Actually, Faye darling, this is exactly what we wanted to know. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Margaret Sanger, Founder of Planned Parenthood, in her own words.
"The most merciful thing that a family does to one of its infant members is to kill it."
Margaret Sanger (editor). The Woman Rebel, Volume I, Number 1. Reprinted in Woman and the New Race. New York: Brentanos Publishers, 1922.
"Birth control must lead ultimately to a cleaner race."
Margaret Sanger. Woman, Morality, and Birth Control. New York: New York Publishing Company, 1922. Page 12.
"We should hire three or four colored ministers, preferably with social-service backgrounds, and with engaging personalities. The most successful educational approach to the Negro is through a religious appeal. We don't want the word to go out that we want to exterminate the Negro population. and the minister is the man who can straighten out that idea if it ever occurs to any of their more rebellious members."
Margaret Sanger's December 19, 1939 letter to Dr. Clarence Gamble, 255 Adams Street, Milton, Massachusetts. Original source: Sophia Smith Collection, Smith College, North Hampton, Massachusetts. Also described in Linda Gordon's Woman's Body, Woman's Right: A Social History of Birth Control in America. New York: Grossman Publishers, 1976.
"Eugenic sterilization is an urgent need ... We must prevent multiplication of this bad stock."
Margaret Sanger, April 1933 Birth Control Review.
"Birth control itself, often denounced as a violation of natural law, is nothing more or less than the facilitation of the process of weeding out the unfit, of preventing the birth of defectives or of those who will become defectives."
[no source available at this time...]
As an advocate of birth control I wish ... to point out that the unbalance between the birth rate of the 'unfit' and the 'fit,' admittedly the greatest present menace to civilization, can never be rectified by the inauguration of a cradle competition between these two classes. In this matter, the example of the inferior classes, the fertility of the feeble-minded, the mentally defective, the poverty-stricken classes, should not be held up for emulation....
On the contrary, the most urgent problem today is how to limit and discourage the over-fertility of the mentally and physically defective.
Margaret Sanger. "The Eugenic Value of Birth Control Propaganda." Birth Control Review, October 1921, page 5.
"Our failure to segregate morons who are increasing and multiplying ... demonstrates our foolhardy and extravagant sentimentalism ... [Philanthropists] encourage the healthier and more normal sections of the world to shoulder the burden of unthinking and indiscriminate fecundity of others; which brings with it, as I think the reader must agree, a dead weight of human waste. Instead of decreasing and aiming to eliminate the stocks that are most detrimental to the future of the race and the world, it tends to render them to a menacing degree dominant ... We are paying for, and even submitting to, the dictates of an ever-increasing, unceasingly spawning class of human beings who never should have been born at all."
Margaret Sanger. The Pivot of Civilization, 1922. Chapter on "The Cruelty of Charity," pages 116, 122, and 189. Swarthmore College Library edition.
"The undeniably feeble-minded should, indeed, not only be discouraged but prevented from propagating their kind."
Margaret Sanger, quoted in Charles Valenza. "Was Margaret Sanger a Racist?" Family Planning Perspectives, January-February 1985, page 44.
"The third group [of society] are those irresponsible and reckless ones having little regard for the consequences of their acts, or whose religious scruples prevent their exercising control over their numbers. Many of this group are diseased, feeble-minded, and are of the pauper element dependent upon the normal and fit members of society for their support. There is no doubt in the minds of all thinking people that the procreation of this group should be stopped."
Margaret Sanger. Speech quoted in Birth Control: What It Is, How It Works, What It Will Do. The Proceedings of the First American Birth Control Conference. Held at the Hotel Plaza, New York City, November 11-12, 1921. Published by the Birth Control Review, Gothic Press, pages 172 and 174.
"The marriage bed is the most degenerative influence in the social order..."
Margaret Sanger (editor). The Woman Rebel, Volume I, Number 1. Reprinted in Woman and the New Race. New York: Brentanos Publishers, 1922.
"[Our objective is] unlimited sexual gratification without the burden of unwanted children..."
Margaret Sanger (editor). The Woman Rebel, Volume I, Number 1. Reprinted in Woman and the New Race. New York: Brentanos Publishers, 1922.
"Give dysgenic groups [people with 'bad genes'] in our population their choice of segregation or [compulsory] sterilization."
Margaret Sanger, April 1932 Birth Control Review.
Margaret Sanger, Founder of Planned Parenthood, proposed the American Baby Code that states, "No woman shall have the legal right to bear a child… without a permit for parenthood".
Margaret Sanger, Founder of Planned Parenthood, proposed the Population Congress with the aim, "...to give certain dysgenic (people with bad genes... like african americans?) groups in our population their choice of segregation or sterilization."
Is this what they mean by planned parenthood? Parenthood that meets their plans? Have you ever noticed that large amount of clinics that have started out in black neighborhoods? Are these people evil? No I don't think most of the people who work there are. Most likely, they are deceived.
But as for Sanger, her motives were extremely clear. Have you seen anything where PP has denounced the beliefs of it's founder? Not some individual, but the organization as a whole? If we consider Hitler evil for his desire to exterminate the Jewish race, what do we say of Sanger? Things that make you go Hmmm... but if Sanger had had her dream, Arsenio Hall may not have been around to start that comedy routine, right?
Source: http://www.eadshome.com/MargaretSanger.htm copyright 2005 EadsHome Ministries
All materials produced by EadsHome Ministries are free for your use as long as a profit is not made.
Materials copyrighted to others are specifically noted and linked.
"As we celebrate the 100th birthday of Margaret Sanger, our outrageous and our courageous leader, we will probably find a number of areas in which we may find more about Margaret Sanger than we thought we wanted to know..."
Faye Wattleton, Past-president of Planned Parenthood
Actually, Faye darling, this is exactly what we wanted to know. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Margaret Sanger, Founder of Planned Parenthood, in her own words.
"The most merciful thing that a family does to one of its infant members is to kill it."
Margaret Sanger (editor). The Woman Rebel, Volume I, Number 1. Reprinted in Woman and the New Race. New York: Brentanos Publishers, 1922.
"Birth control must lead ultimately to a cleaner race."
Margaret Sanger. Woman, Morality, and Birth Control. New York: New York Publishing Company, 1922. Page 12.
"We should hire three or four colored ministers, preferably with social-service backgrounds, and with engaging personalities. The most successful educational approach to the Negro is through a religious appeal. We don't want the word to go out that we want to exterminate the Negro population. and the minister is the man who can straighten out that idea if it ever occurs to any of their more rebellious members."
Margaret Sanger's December 19, 1939 letter to Dr. Clarence Gamble, 255 Adams Street, Milton, Massachusetts. Original source: Sophia Smith Collection, Smith College, North Hampton, Massachusetts. Also described in Linda Gordon's Woman's Body, Woman's Right: A Social History of Birth Control in America. New York: Grossman Publishers, 1976.
"Eugenic sterilization is an urgent need ... We must prevent multiplication of this bad stock."
Margaret Sanger, April 1933 Birth Control Review.
"Birth control itself, often denounced as a violation of natural law, is nothing more or less than the facilitation of the process of weeding out the unfit, of preventing the birth of defectives or of those who will become defectives."
[no source available at this time...]
As an advocate of birth control I wish ... to point out that the unbalance between the birth rate of the 'unfit' and the 'fit,' admittedly the greatest present menace to civilization, can never be rectified by the inauguration of a cradle competition between these two classes. In this matter, the example of the inferior classes, the fertility of the feeble-minded, the mentally defective, the poverty-stricken classes, should not be held up for emulation....
On the contrary, the most urgent problem today is how to limit and discourage the over-fertility of the mentally and physically defective.
Margaret Sanger. "The Eugenic Value of Birth Control Propaganda." Birth Control Review, October 1921, page 5.
"Our failure to segregate morons who are increasing and multiplying ... demonstrates our foolhardy and extravagant sentimentalism ... [Philanthropists] encourage the healthier and more normal sections of the world to shoulder the burden of unthinking and indiscriminate fecundity of others; which brings with it, as I think the reader must agree, a dead weight of human waste. Instead of decreasing and aiming to eliminate the stocks that are most detrimental to the future of the race and the world, it tends to render them to a menacing degree dominant ... We are paying for, and even submitting to, the dictates of an ever-increasing, unceasingly spawning class of human beings who never should have been born at all."
Margaret Sanger. The Pivot of Civilization, 1922. Chapter on "The Cruelty of Charity," pages 116, 122, and 189. Swarthmore College Library edition.
"The undeniably feeble-minded should, indeed, not only be discouraged but prevented from propagating their kind."
Margaret Sanger, quoted in Charles Valenza. "Was Margaret Sanger a Racist?" Family Planning Perspectives, January-February 1985, page 44.
"The third group [of society] are those irresponsible and reckless ones having little regard for the consequences of their acts, or whose religious scruples prevent their exercising control over their numbers. Many of this group are diseased, feeble-minded, and are of the pauper element dependent upon the normal and fit members of society for their support. There is no doubt in the minds of all thinking people that the procreation of this group should be stopped."
Margaret Sanger. Speech quoted in Birth Control: What It Is, How It Works, What It Will Do. The Proceedings of the First American Birth Control Conference. Held at the Hotel Plaza, New York City, November 11-12, 1921. Published by the Birth Control Review, Gothic Press, pages 172 and 174.
"The marriage bed is the most degenerative influence in the social order..."
Margaret Sanger (editor). The Woman Rebel, Volume I, Number 1. Reprinted in Woman and the New Race. New York: Brentanos Publishers, 1922.
"[Our objective is] unlimited sexual gratification without the burden of unwanted children..."
Margaret Sanger (editor). The Woman Rebel, Volume I, Number 1. Reprinted in Woman and the New Race. New York: Brentanos Publishers, 1922.
"Give dysgenic groups [people with 'bad genes'] in our population their choice of segregation or [compulsory] sterilization."
Margaret Sanger, April 1932 Birth Control Review.
Margaret Sanger, Founder of Planned Parenthood, proposed the American Baby Code that states, "No woman shall have the legal right to bear a child… without a permit for parenthood".
Margaret Sanger, Founder of Planned Parenthood, proposed the Population Congress with the aim, "...to give certain dysgenic (people with bad genes... like african americans?) groups in our population their choice of segregation or sterilization."
Is this what they mean by planned parenthood? Parenthood that meets their plans? Have you ever noticed that large amount of clinics that have started out in black neighborhoods? Are these people evil? No I don't think most of the people who work there are. Most likely, they are deceived.
But as for Sanger, her motives were extremely clear. Have you seen anything where PP has denounced the beliefs of it's founder? Not some individual, but the organization as a whole? If we consider Hitler evil for his desire to exterminate the Jewish race, what do we say of Sanger? Things that make you go Hmmm... but if Sanger had had her dream, Arsenio Hall may not have been around to start that comedy routine, right?
Source: http://www.eadshome.com/MargaretSanger.htm copyright 2005 EadsHome Ministries
All materials produced by EadsHome Ministries are free for your use as long as a profit is not made.
Materials copyrighted to others are specifically noted and linked.
Friday, April 07, 2006
A Good Day
With all of the health issues lately, I was happy to see that yesterday was a good day. Really!
I guess I could go super spiritual and say "all days are good days" and I guess they are. But yesterday, it was a good day.
Did I experience pain? Sure. The pain never goes away. Did I have issues? Lots of them. So why was it a good day?
Because I got to talk my friend and pastor David Kerr.
Because I got to talk to my friend Jason.
Because my best friend Rob tried to scare me again and failed... (OK he scared me a little).
Because I was able to say no to the temptation to go out to eat.
Because I heard from a young lady I haven't spoken to in almost a decade (She came to my concert when she was really a little girl). Now she's 23, training for missions and seeking the Lord's will for her life.
Because I got to sit down with my family and watch something together that we all were interested in. (It was about a Super Tornado)
Because I found an old Walmart card and realized it had six dollars on it still.
Just because...
It's nice to have one of those from time to time.
I guess I could go super spiritual and say "all days are good days" and I guess they are. But yesterday, it was a good day.
Did I experience pain? Sure. The pain never goes away. Did I have issues? Lots of them. So why was it a good day?
Because I got to talk my friend and pastor David Kerr.
Because I got to talk to my friend Jason.
Because my best friend Rob tried to scare me again and failed... (OK he scared me a little).
Because I was able to say no to the temptation to go out to eat.
Because I heard from a young lady I haven't spoken to in almost a decade (She came to my concert when she was really a little girl). Now she's 23, training for missions and seeking the Lord's will for her life.
Because I got to sit down with my family and watch something together that we all were interested in. (It was about a Super Tornado)
Because I found an old Walmart card and realized it had six dollars on it still.
Just because...
It's nice to have one of those from time to time.
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